Written by Krista Moyer
Published: February 25, 2014 at 4:21 AM [UTC]
At some point in the journey something happened. My ear advanced far beyond my capability. Although everyone who has heard me insists that I am continuing to improve, I feel as if I am going backwards.
It doesn't help that everything gets substantially harder and longer in Suzuki book four. Nor does it help that stressors in my life are currently coming from every possible direction with unprecedented vigor. Frankly, that's just how things go sometimes. We get through the rough spots. But having the violin, the one real thing I do just for me, cause so much struggle and heartache at the same time as life's hard knocks is frustrating.
Playing the violin is always a choice, unlike parenting a sullen pre-teen, coping with office politics, or even dealing with the doggone burst pipe (thanks for nothing, polar vortex). It's something I'm planning to keep in my life. However, I feel as if I need to reevaluate. Perhaps slowing down, or even changing directions for a while will help me regain my footing and allow my technique to catch up. I'm sure my teacher will have good advice.
Honestly, I'm not sure what the answer is. Sadly, that's where being a late starter really leaves you hanging. There are no peers, no ensemble partners, nobody to kvetch with in the cafeteria. It's easy to feel adrift.
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Vincent Oliver
It's been three years since I started playing, again, and I'm still in the middle of Book 2. However, I'm a much better student and a much better amateur violinist for having taken a break and come back to my studies. I appreciate the process so much more, and am more respectful of the time I allocate to studying. My technique and intonation is better than it has ever been, and I enjoy playing so much more.
I think that if I had "forced" myself to keep playing despite everything else that was going on in my life, I would have resented the work, given up, never to return to my studies. Instead of looking at not playing as "quitting", I looked at it as "stopping for right now". Perhaps that will work for you. Nothing says that you can't take a break from your study and come back to it, again, later. Or not at all.
Good luck!
What helps is having my great teacher, who is always supportive and keeps telling me what progress I have made, instead of pointing out all the flaws. What also helps is playing in a group. Our music school has a small ensemble of musicians of all plumage who have nothing in common but a late-life start in music (and a tendency to erroneous playing :-)
What I didn't know about myself and have only discovered after I started playing the violin, is that however much of an individualist I act as in many aspects of my life... what bliss it is to be PART of something and part of a piece of music that's being played by people who work hard to be able to perform it and enjoy it so much when it iunally comes out right.
So maybe that would be my advice, if I have any to offer, find some group of people on your current performance level, to get together with and share the joy.
Seriously I think all 'late' starters internationally shall come together and start chamber groups, support groups, and music events. Music shall be for everyone.
I feel you really well as a late starter, violin is not even a common instrument here in Philippines but i met a lot of violinist here but i hardly find someone that has the same passion as mine that is willing to build a group that will encourage progress, give motivation and have some place to belong to and i think i'm the only person now in this city who's so serious about taking this thing into seriously. Even thou i meet a lot of violinist, most of the are kids and still beginners, so basically i'm in an island in terms of passion and skill level.
The only thing that's driving me to practice everyday and the thing that keeps my eye on the ultimate goal of being able to play Carmen Fantasy someday is by watching the current Menuhin Violin Competition. Videos and the world wide web has been my only friend. Just take it easy, passion goes up and down. If you feel blessed compared to my situation here then you have no reason to stop.
Enough about me and my failures; I admire adults attempting the hopeless task of learning to play the violin and finding personal and social happiness. Keep grinding along and something good should happen -- you are a beacon of hope and inspiration to others, even myself trying to increase my repetoire with Bach Partitas while playing to the furniture.
Karen, I never realized you felt that way. Perhaps I should have, but you have always seemed so accomplished to me.
Steve, I'm not going to stop. It just feels like I need to take a step back and play some easier pieces to get my wind back.
Linda, sadly there are no beginner groups in this area. All of the orchestras have audition requirements beyond my capability at this time; I'm not attracted to fiddle jams, and I have no contact with other adult students. I'll keep trying though.
Terrence, your idea to create tons of opportunities sounds wonderful. If only....
Nicola, keep drawing inspiration from the world. It sounds as if you are doing a great job of it.
Alice, your point is well taken. I think I will do just that.
Thank you to everyone for reading and commenting!
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